Being a stubborn elder is pretty stupid, if you ask me

On Wednesday, I went shopping with all the girls in my elder gang. Jay, my mom and my mother in law. I didn't get Uncle Al on Wednesday, Jay isn't very healthy and I needed to give her my undivided attention.

Jay was walking slower than Tim Conway on the old Carol Burnet Show! My mother and my ML were walking way ahead. They usually have trouble keeping up with me, today, they were walking way ahead of me.

Rachel really likes my dear old Aunt Jay... what's not to like about Jay? Actually, the more I get to know Rachel, the more I see Jay in her.

Rachel has been researching on the internet all of Jay's drugs. None of us understand what conditions Jay has. All we get from Jay is that "her heart is dying", "Her heart has dry blood (?)" "She can't drink water because it turns to salt." (??) I'm so confused!!!

Her ankles were swollen on Wednesday. I did put her feet in my hands and give her healing Reiki energy, she really needed it. She let me do it.

Her face is puffy with red blotches. I'm a bit worried about this symptom.

Rachel is freaked because Jay had CHF and she's being treated with meds for someone who's had a heart attack. Here's one of the articles that Rachel found by the American Heart Association and printed out for me to read,

What has me worried about Jay is she's sicker than I can ever remember seeing her. Jay was the one to walk EVERYWHERE just until maybe a year ago when she was put on all the damn drugs.

Who puts an 85 year old woman on Coumadin and Toprol? Toprol caused my mom to hallucinate so badly that she thought that she was jumping over a river but was jumping out of bed and banging her head on her night stand. I've lived through my mom screaming through the house about babies... nothing like being awakened at 2am by your horrified mom screaming about a baby that needed help. I'm so glad that is over.

Jay is weak. I'm worried for her life.

Today, I called her to check to see how she was doing. I apologized in advanced for butting my nose into her business but I had to speak my mind. I told her that I love her so much and worry about her health. Her puffy face and blotchy face could be an early symptom of a more serious condition. Her swollen ankles... not good. Her blocked ears? Not sure it's wax build up like her nurse told her.

I've asked her if we could go see her doctor with her, she said, "no." She won't let anyone go with her. Today, I felt driven to tell her that she needs to let someone in our family go with her, if it's not me it needs to be Linda, my cousin, the woman who lived with her for so many years before she got married recently to an awesome man, Maniac Mike Keenan.

I love Mike. You can see his website here - he plays music for Homeless Veterans and Veterans Homes - and my house of course. He was on Jerry Springer, singing a song about "When Jerry Wins an Emmy" Very funny.

Ok... I started to digress, maybe I've been hanging out with the old folks too long. I need a good day out on the golf course VERY SOON.

I told Jay exactly what was on my mind. I told her what Rachel had learned through her research and even told her "Rachel told me to tell you... " stuff while Rachel stood on the other side of the room smiling and grinning. Rachel wants her to go to Mass General NOW. Like me she believes that she needs to be in the hospital.

Instead, she lives alone with her cats upstairs from my newly married young cousin.

I cried on the phone with Jay earlier today. I was pleading with her to call the doctor. She told me that she was eating lunch. I didn't let that stop me. I told her how worried I was because she is sicker than I've ever seen her and if these doctors are so good, why isn't she well? Then she tells me that the doctors tell her that her heart is dying... that she is old... what the fuck is that all about?!

Jay had Congestive Heart Failure. She should be in similar shape as my mom and my mother in law, who both had CHF attacks. The moms are doing awesome. Jay on the other hand is dying and I'm not going to let that happen. She doesn't want to die. I asked her today. She said NO.

I need to call her in the morning to see if she changed her mind about getting a second opinion and apologize for nosing in. I never ever nose in to Jay's health business but for some reason, I feel that if I don't say something, I'll be attending a Catholic Funeral very soon.... my wish is to see Jay happy and health, shopping and having fun with me, my mom and my mom in love.