You Know It's Not Going To Be Good When...

1 AM I heard our dining room floor boards squeak.  My mom was up and walking around.

Woken out of a very good sleep, I bolted up the stairs.  I smelled fresh shit.  I thought to myself, "Well, this can't be good."

I was right.

I looked down the hall toward my mom's bedroom and I saw her standing with her night gown above her waist and she had removed her diaper.  The horror.  I rushed down the hall to help her sit on the toilet.  She had shit all over her legs and feet.  I gave her a shower to clean the crap off her body, it was like freaking glue.  Not something I ever wanted to face, let alone at 1AM when I had been sleeping so soundly.

I retraced my steps down the hall and could smell shit, it was horrible.  She had left a trail of shit from the dining room and up the hall leading to her room.  I cleaned it up, gagging and wishing that a bed would open soon in a home.  I'm grateful that I didn't step in it, she managed to leave the trail at the top stair landing.

Cleaning up feces is no fun and it's the main reason I never had children.  I always viewed kids as little shit machines, they eat... they shit; my mom, she is now our big shit machine.  She eats, drives me crazy, shits and drives me closer to the nut farm.

My mom doesn't like wearing diapers.  She needs to wear them, period.  How do I get her to keep her pants on in the middle of the night?  How do I get her to see her bathroom that is attached to her bedroom?  I leave the light on and the door open for her to see when she wakes up in the middle of the night.  She always passes the bathroom, rarely knowing it's closer than she believes it to be, especially when she's half asleep.

Today, I'll spend the day steam cleaning the floors and carpet.  The last thing I want is for my house to smell like a nursing home.  I'm grateful that I have the machines to help make the job easier.  Steam cleaners are one of the greatest inventions.  I recommend every parent and or Care Giver own at least one.  The steam gets into the crevices where shit lands and is difficult to clean.  The steam sterilizes too, eliminating all odors and germs.

My mom is off to the day program, up and out by 7:05 this morning.  Yay!  I have the day to myself and boy, do I need it today.