Rising Expectations in the Demented Mind

My mom and Cheryl after her first day at the ADH Program.
Cheryl was key in making it happen... Thank you!

During times of revolutions, people get the guts to revolt because of their rising expectations.  Folks get a taste of a new life and when our expectations rise, we want more and we want it NOW!

Throughout history, rising expectations has caused our ancestors to kick some butt and in the process creating a new life for themselves and their families.  It happened in our own country during the American Revolution, it happened during the Civil Rights Movement and today it's happening for my mom and me.

Acupuncture appears to be giving my mom rising expectations, she's feeling better and is actually able to string words together into coherent sentences.  Gradual improvement is what we are noticing, each acupuncture treatment moves her one step further away from her inevitable decline.  She is happy when she can communicate her thoughts and express her opinions, just like she always had been able to do before her demented mind took residence in her head.

My mom is forming her own revolution, a revolution of freedom from her demented mind; all brought about because of the perceived improvement of her health leading to rising expectations of life.  My mom, she believes she will now live to the beautiful age of 200.  That's right, my mom believes that she is getting better and will live another 119 years... God help me.

Yesterday morning my mom woke up angry with me.  She was mad.  I don't know what I had done, then she began to tell me, "Oh, you will be sorry.  There were 30 of them following us, you were driving and they were after us.  You have crosses all over you, you are going to be sorry.  I need to get away from you!

"Ma, do you want to go to the "center" today and see your friends?"  I had asked her calmly, not wanting to fuel her anger.

"Yes!  But I don't have a car.  I will tell everyone what you had done, you will be sorry."  My mom continued on in a rage, one that made no sense to me at all.  Ma was ranting.  

"Ok.  Would you like a ham wrap sandwich for lunch?"  I asked.  "We'll leave as soon as I make your lunch." I added.

It has been intense with her over the last couple of weeks.  The changes in her environment triggered unacceptable behaviors and my sadness didn't help alleviate the trouble, it made it worse.  I had rising expectations too when we had Cheryl coming every week.  I was just beginning to feel that I was getting a little bit of my life back.  A life where I can work because I love working; I miss having a job.  I miss talking to real people and working toward a common goal with a team of like minded individuals.  I had my own rising expectations, I had hope.

Hope is restored.

Yesterday, I brought my mom to the Adult Day Healthcare program in Chelmsford.  It was my mom's idea, not mine, she wanted to be with her new friends.  She wanted to "tell on me" whatever it was that she believed that I had done.  Great... go ahead, tell on me... I'll drive you now; I thought to myself.  I made her lunch as quickly as I could.

The nurses were waiting for us, I had called and told them that my mom wanted to go there for the day.  We were all excited because getting my mom to agree to go to the ADH program has been a challenge.  It was challenging mostly because my mom is anti-social, she has never been a social butterfly, she's shy around new people and she needed it to be her idea.  Yesterday, we had a big breakthrough, it was her idea and the end of the 3rd week of her attending day care... a habit was born!

Cheryl was instrumental in helping to transition my mom over to an Adult Day Health program.  We are grateful for the key role that she had played.  I am sorry that the relationship broke down the way it did between her agency, the Visiting Angels in Chelmsford and me just before we had success.  We accomplished the goal; Jo likes her new friends, she wants to go and she is looking forward to going next Tuesday.

Thank you Cheryl, you are a fabulous Care Giver and we appreciate what you have done to help my mom adjust to a day program, something that she really needed, it was the missing component to her health plan.

Yesterday, when I arrived to pick her up, they were having a sing-a-long, my mom was singing and was not ready to leave.  She made me wait while she sang, "One more song" she'd say to the activity director... then there was "one more song."  I waited gladly.

The nurses and aides at the Chelmsford ADH Program are the professionals we needed for my mom.  They are bringing her out of her shell, she feels comfortable with everyone and when we were leaving yesterday, she had to go around and hug people as she said, "I'll see you on Tuesday!"

My mom has rising expectations and her demented mind appears to be waking up from it's slumber.  Today my mom has her 7th acupuncture treatment, the 7th in a row, just as the study suggested.  It's working.  We are excited and I can clearly see her expectations rising, something that I never thought possible, rising expectations in the demented mind.